30 things I want for my 30th birthday 8

goatI survived!

After 12 consecutive days of house guests at Casa de Taylor, I am alone in my home for what seems like the first time in years. My brain (and my kitchen) hasn’t quite recovered, which is why I’ve decided to forgo a real post in favor of a list of all the ‘ish I want for my birthday this year. No matter how exhausted I am, I’ll always have the mental clarity and energy to brainstorm presents for myself. It’s one of my hidden talents. (In addition to unicycling.)

Without further ado, 30 material possessions I would love for people to throw in my general direction on July 28th so that I might forget I’m no longer in my twenties:

  1. A restaurant grade espresso machine.
  2. A pet goat.
  3. This bag from Lululemon that I would immediately turn into a fanny pack.
  4. A trip to Italy…
  5. And Greece…
  6. And Africa…
  7. And the nearest In-N-Out Burger.
  8. Eyelash extensions.
  9. A traditional, custom-made bunad.
  10. A pet goat.
  11. A sauna.
  12. New underwear.
  13. This über modern cat condo. (Nicely done, Wal-Mart. Nicely done.)
  14. A sweet pair of weightlifting shoes. (Who have I become?)
  15. A new washer and dryer. Practical and urgent as our belligerent washing machine started leaking water in front of the company this week. (The nerve!)
  16. This book. I saw it at a local winery this weekend, and felt as if I had met my diet soul mate. Oops..already bought it for myself.
  17. A girl date with Blake Lively.
  18. A boy date with Leo DiCaprio
  19. A pet goat.
  20. A box full of French macarons.
  21. This Australia mug from Starbucks. (I accidentally broke mine.)
  22. The Amazon Fire phone.
  23. A magical machine that gets rid of stretch marks and cellulite.
  24. A unisex hamster costume…obviously.
  25. Tickets to Norwegian language camp.
  26. A lifetime supply of pickles.
  27. A home gym, complete with floor to ceiling mirrors.
  28. A classic plaid shirt in fire engine red.
  29. A reserved spot as a cast member on a reality TV show. (Preferably one with a cash prize, but I’ll take just about anything.)
  30. A pet goat.

I was this close to adding an upgraded wedding ring…but I didn’t want to push it. Scott’s going to have his hands full building the goat house as it is.

If you’re feeling generous, I’m registered at Target.

(Not really.)

(But you have to admit…that’s kind of a good idea.)

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Daily Photo: Cards against the parents 7


Rum Chata + Cards Against Humanity = a slightly warped version of family game night.

I believe this photo was taken as my mother read the card about two midgets doing inappropriate things into a bucket. God bless her.

(And yes, my dad is wearing pair of shorts. We do have some standards around here.)

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Daily Photo: Ticket to ride…? 1



I have absolutely no idea what this two-person bicycle contraption is called.

What I do know is that my brother and I “pretended” not to see the sign about paying to rent one before taking it on a quick joyride around our local winery.


Naturally, my cheapskate father couldn’t have been more proud. Mark’s moral code doesn’t hold a candle to his vehement opposal of rental fees.

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