Today’s post comes from a Miniature Pinscher named Chloe.
Yes, I let dogs guest post on the blog. Did you expect anything less from the girl who almost paid $500 to fly her own pooch to San Diego for her 56th birthday?
While I commonly refer to Jolie as a chihuahua, she’s actually half Miniature Pinscher. Little did I know that both she and Chloe share the dream of becoming a rich, famous supermodels.
I feel like there’s a brilliant reality show concept here — similar to America’s Next Top Model, except Tyra gets peed on when she eliminates a temperamental schnauzer. The producers could even rig it so that her weave gets infested with fleas in the season finale.
I know…I’m, like, totally the next Jeff Franklin.
Anyway, Jolie and Chloe have so much in common, I’ve decided they’re BFFs. The fact that Chloe lives with her owner Corinne in Ohio, and has never technically met Jolie clearly irrelevant.
I mean, you can totally be BFFs without ever having face to face contact. Take me and Jen Aniston, for example. While we’ve never sat down in person for coffee or anything, she totally adores the blog and sends me love on Twitter all the time. (I have a sneaking suspicion she’s going to ask me to man the guest book at her wedding.)
Okay…that last analogy was a lie. I love John Mayer way too much for Jen to consider being friends with me.
You know what? I’m just gonna let the dog start talking before I dig myself any deeper.
Supermodel Min Pin
Before I start, I have to get this out of the way. I’m a Miniature Pinscher but I usually prefer to be called a Min Pin. It rolls off the tongue nicely, don’t you think? My mom calls me the best and cutest Min Pin ever, and she’s always right. But what I have to say is, I’m not a mini version of a Doberman! I’m cuter and cuddlier, and I’m pretty sure I could go everywhere my mom goes if she would buy me a pretty puppy bag, like this one:
Also, I could totally beat up a Doberman. My mom says that I’m a big dog in a little dog package, and that’s why she picked me. I think she’s making it up. She picked me because I was the cutest one out of all my siblings.
I’m convinced that one day, I will be a super model. I started out all short and chubby, but now, I’m tall and skinny, and I have big ears, which is my “something different” or whatever they say super models have. One girl has a big gap in her teeth, one girl has freckles, I have my big ears! People make fun of my ears all the time. They even think I’m a Chihuahua (no offense, Jolie). But I tell them, nope, I’m a Min Pin, then I flip my ears back and raise my head just a little bit so they can see how model-y I am.
My favorite thing in the whole world though is to simply cuddle with my mom. When I got to go home with her two years ago, I lived in a little apartment in Virginia. It was really hot there, but I made friends with lots of other dogs. Then right after I got comfortable, we moved to Ohio. That wasn’t so bad, but my mom made me live in two different places once we got out there. I didn’t have a lot of friends. I just spent a lot of time with my mom because she always made me feel better. The people we lived with in the first house were really nice but I was sad. The vet said I was stressed. I even started losing my hair! Seriously, what little adorable puppy loses her hair?!
Everything was better once I got my own house. My mom paid for it, but it’s mine. Everything is mine.
Anyway, the house is big and I have lots of friends. My kitties have finally realized that I’m the one in charge, and they need to listen to me. I still like to cuddle with my mom, but I don’t mind being away from her so much now. My mom says I’m “growing up” but I haven’t gotten any taller yet. My favorite part about living in Ohio? Camp Bow Wow! They call it day care, I call it super awesome fun time!
It’s so cool. All I do is play. That’s it! All the counselors and other campers think I’m the best and always want to play with me and show them my model poses. It’s pretty awesome. Who doesn’t love being cute and running and jumping and playing all day long?!
Seriously, who could resist my cuteness?
Note from Corinne:
I picked Chloe because she was the only black and tan female Min Pin. She just so happened to be the cutest one. She is also terrible at sharing.
Check out the adventures of Corinne and Chloe on their blog!